Thoughts and Feedback on the animatic...

Looking back, I am aware that the storyboard was horribly rushed so there's many many faults with the story. Each time I watch the animatic I like it less and less which suggests I should apply some drastic changes...yet again! So it's back to the old drawing board. I'm now stuck thinking about how I can change this story slightly to add more excitement and drama or whether I should scrap the idea completely and start anew. Things are rather tough, I've focussed too hard on the message that I forgot to make an enjoyable short story but I'm afraid that if I just worked on a story it'll lack an underlying message (which the tutors have been critical about a lot...)

Feedback

In short, my animatic is boring and confusing :) - it wasn't quite worded that way by my tutors but I agree with them because that's how I felt the more the watched it :(

Confusing

The confusing side is due to the interaction between the two characters. From the beginning of the film the male character is a ghost so he is dead and I wanted some interaction with the woman as a way of showing the influence the guy has on her even after death. The woman's acknowledgement of the ghost's presence is meant to be my way of suggesting to the audience that the ghost may be an image she conjured up as a coping mechanism for the loss of her fiancé. It all makes sense in my head but I that's because I know what I'm trying to do but to a first time viewer it'll make no sense.

Boring

The boring side is that the pacing doesn't change throughout the film. I have been thinking about Michael Dudok de Wit's "Father and Daughter" whilst storyboarding because, in my opinion, the pacing in that film remains quite the same throughout the film but that film had a goal...the audience watches on to see if the girl ever meets her father again. What my film lacks is a goal, an imbalance that the audience would want to see reach balance again but I'm troubled over how to do this. Either I keep tweaking the film to make it more exciting or I start afresh with a completely new story. only time will tell...and time is running out!

And more problems...

...who's point of view are we seeing this film from? Generally there should be a primary focus on one of the characters but it doesn't come across in the film. I want the audience to sympathise with the ghost - to support the fact that he doesn't want to disappear from the world. All this thinking is confusing me and I'm feeling like I'm losing sense of my message.